I say, jumping on the latest clickbait jargon for lazy hipster journos.
The aftermath of the 2016 Scottish elections has created a lot of froth and foam. Let's sift through the debris.
1 - The Tory revival. In footballing terms, the Tories have made the top six of the SPL after years flirting with relegation. They're still playing guff fitba but they've enjoyed some fortune against their derby rivals. They are however, a country mile behind the league leaders. Perversely, they actually polled lower than hapless Labour meaning that only one-in-five of those who voted chose Satan. Many of these were tactical votes - some from Blairite ex-Labour voters and some apparently from the farming community, angry at an SNP delay in payments.
They're still polling less than John Major did. Christ on a crutch...
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| SPFL league according to Ruth Davidson |
2 - Labour are now entering their habitual post-election period of 'listening' to the public having acheived yet another low. It's not easy to pinpoint where exactly Labour lost the trust of its once natural constituency - Blair and Iraq? Blair himself? Abandoning nationalisation? Selling policy to billionaires like Bernie Ecclestone? The PFI disgrace? Slandering striking workers as 'fascists'? Miliband? Anti immigration mugs?
Poor Kezia Dugdale who was bewildered just a few years ago at actually being elected is even more befuddled in her current stint as human shield for the Branch Office. Maybe pics of her holding up a 'Vote Green' poster are a sign that she has sights on coming over to the good side eventually?
3- The Rev Stuart Campbell from Wings Over Scotland continues to be an objectionable wank. Tocasaid has covered his bizarre anti-Gaelic rant before but he's topped that by his stubborn and insensitive - wrong, even - comments on Hillsborough. He's also peeved that the SNP didn't get an outright majority due to us dullards not following HIS instructions though he does admit that the SNP actually increased their vote. He's now aiming his blunderbuss at anyone who questioned his #BothVotesSNP dictat, including the likes of Bella Caledonia and the Greens. Bizarrely, he's now attacking Green voters on class grounds and Bella on readership stats. I'd imagine that there's a fair bit of truth in the claim that Green voters are mostly middle-class. It's just that Stuart Campbell's adopted home of Bath, that's BATH, sticks out a bit in the roll-call of Proletarian heartlands... Toxteth, Brixton, Easterhouse, Hulme, Craigmillar, Bath...
Bye Wings, was nice while it lasted...
4 - RISE didn't rise very high at all. While I agree with the jist of them - I've voted SSP in the past - I find their existence as a political party to be pointless at this moment. Some of their stunts are bizarre and the little communication I've had with them has been off-putting.
I was amazed that while their manifesto was a nigh-comprehensive list of worthy causes that they couldn't find room for Scottish/ Gaelic culture and the more the campaign wore on, the less relevant they were to me... Driving around Glasgow in a transit blaring out Bella Ciao? A fine song, but what on earth does an Italian partisan anti-fascist anthem have to do with the Scottish elections? If RISE really need to enforce their playlist on Glaswegians, could they not find something a bit more relevant? Dick Gaughan? Hamish Henderson?
And bellowing at McDonald's customers with megaphones?
And the RISE Young Team? Who?! Presumably it was one of the Youth Team, and a candidate no less, that tweeted a death wish to the Rev Stu...Word on the street bruv is dat's a dumb ting to do...
Little wonder that despite disproportiante media coverage they finished behind Tommy Sheridan's Solidarity. Bit of a 'red neck' given their antipathy towards Tommy and his ego.
5 - The SNP did well. The SNP are patently the best vehicle on the road to independence. I'm not wedded to one party though and a plurality of parties in a future Yes campaign must be for the good. Wings Over Scotland may be right that the Greens, so far, are not 'popular' with most voters but then again neither are the SNP. Nevertheless, they do represent a significant body of opinion and that 6 to 12% depending on where you vote may deliver a crucial majority in #indyref2.
Nicola Sturgeon is a powerhouse of a politcal leader and the SNP generally a force for good. However, they do need to pay attention to who they choose to represent them in elections. Taking money from the likes of Brian Souter may not be cool but if the SNP can put his dosh to progressive use then I can live with that. On the other hand, wild horses would not drive me to vote for Christian heidbangers who openly display their prejudice to gay and women's rights. I believe there were one or two such 'guid Catholics' on the SNP list. Get rid. Personal beliefs should be kept personal. An invisible guy in the sky should have no bearing on government in a modern Scotland.
6- The Lib Dems. Meh. Can't be bothered writing about them.
7- All-in-all, with more than 50% of the vote going to pro-Indy parties and an SNP/ Green majority in Holyrood, the mandate is there to call #Indyref2 when the time is right.
Pour yourself a dram, relax and prepare for an independent Scotland sometime in the near future.
