House hunting with David Cameron

Bad news for Scotland. The Tories are having their annual North British shindig in our capital city.

The good news is, David Cameron, the leader of the party's Inner Secretariat in South Britain has come to share some of his inherited wealth er, pearls of wisdumb amongst the proles and Porridge Wogs of Pictland.

Better news though is that Tariq Ali's lecture, brought to us by the Radical Independence Campaign, attracted more people that the leader of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland - hell, I look forward to the day when we are simply the independent nations of Scotland, England, Wales and Ireland.

Cameron - cam shròn or 'crooked nose' in the Scottish vernacular - did say something that caught my attention though. He compared voting for independence to making a Very Important Decision such as buying a house. Wait a minute... what the fuck would he know about buying a house?

Here is a picture of David's house or at least one of them. The house that dad built.

Those RUK flag options

As the possibility of life's destruction draws near, for those on the London Gravy Train at least, the Brit Nats are spiralling into a descent of Titanic proportions. First of all, the ridiculous talking anus that is Fraser Nelson - he who makes Malcom Rifkind sound like Begbie - admits in the Telegraph that the 'broon eyes' in Downing Street are 'knittin socks' at the prospect of a 'yes' vote for Scottish independence next year.

Then, LibDem 'big beast' Alastair Carmichael morphs into 'Carcrash Carmichael' as he splutters a response to the SNP's White Paper on a future independent Scotland. A scapegoat is found in the form of 'comatose' Alistair 'Black Dwarf' Darling, he of the silver hair, swarthy eyebrows and sorry record of taking Bankrupt Britain's economy to new depths. Equally, within the Labour camp, there is much frothing about standing together with the toxic Tories in the Bitter Together campaign. Fancy that... the Unionists seem to be falling apart!

Do not disturb.

On top of this, a bitter cherry was placed to finish off the cake. Just what would the RUK - Rest of the UK, that is - flag look like without the Scotch input?

Tocasaid has garnered some ideas from a variety of graphic-expert whizz kids and here, they will be thrown into the mix. A whisky soaked tongue may be stuck firmly in the cheek but are they really any more ludicrous than this garish gallery of grimness from the BBC?

The titular example above not only alludes to the UK's eye-watering debt, its lap-dog relationship with the US but has added LibDem yellow to the great flag as to pay tribute to the Lib Dem's selfless determination and true Brit Grit to prop up any minority government it can be it Labour or Toxic Tory.

Grey Britain

On a similar theme, we have a modern grey and brown construction. A camera reminds us that we are being watched more than ever, for our own safety. The grey represents the grim reality of a drab life in boom and bust Britain. The brown... is left to your own imagination.

The British Rising Sin

But hey! Chin up Rupert! There's always a cheery sun to lift our spirits. This one is dominated by a soft pink to project the caring face of Britain. The image of Princess Di was chosen by a narrow margin over that of John 'G4S' Reid to shine down upon the adoring British subjects. Her spirit above will surely guide the good ship RUK safely away from Scotchland's rocky shores. The title though is an apt warning that even the saintly can find themselves going astray and refers to the People's Princess' unwise dalliance with an Arab playboy shortly before her death at the hands of the evil Duke of Edinbane.

RUK plc

The last offering comes from those bright-sparks at the Tax Payers' Alliance who suggested the novel idea of having sponsorship on the national teatowel. This shows that RUK plc will be back in business, oil money or not! It is thought that Amazon and Starbucks have offered slightly more for their advertising than they paid in tax over the last five years.

?

The last one is for real and perhaps the scariest thing to come out of Project Fear's anti-independence arsenal so far.

The slavering James MacMillan

The highly esteemed, or is it just steaming? - composer James MacMillan CBE has opened his little bearded slit again. The pompous Tory and defender of the Catholic Church has this time pulled his wire in the direction of National Collective - comparing them to "Mussolini's followers" and whinging that artists should not support politicians.

Ho-ho! Firstly...

Being an evangelical proponent of Roman Catholicism, I would imagine that Fascist dictators are something MacMillan and his church know a lot about.

Secondly, while I agree that 'artists supporting politicians' probably ain't cool, coming from a pompous phallus like MacMillan whose name is suffixed by CBE it is a wee bit strange. It is worth remembering that CBE stands for Commander of the Most Excellent Order of the British Empire and is part of an 'order of chivalry' known as Most Excellent Order of the British Empire. How very progressive.

Lastly, to my knowledge, National Collective do not support any 'politicians' but seek self-determination and a progressive, fair future for Scotland.

Statue to MacMillan CBE in his native Ayr

Is he for real?

Alas, he is and he has form. He used to vote Tory but of late he has taken offence to the Scottish Tory leader, who happens to be gay, and her comments on Catholic schools. Interestingly, MacMillan was supported by the Glaswegian-turned-Irishman Phil Mac Giolla Bháin - a man who views love of Celtic FC and the Roman Catholic superstition as integral to the Irish ethnicity. Once upon a time, Phil used to be left-leaning proponent of Celtic solidarity but in his interview he gave the very Scottish and right-wing MacMillan carte-blanche to expound upon his 'social conservatism' and why the Tories should do more to attract Catholics to vote for them.

Funnily enough MacMillan seems to have kept schtum on the Catholic Crutch's shameful and ever-emerging record of child abuse. Why speak out on behalf of children - designated 'Catholic' by their parents - when you can lambast a lesbian Conservative on her opposition to segregated schooling? And, as he has a lingering interest in Fascist dictators, I wonder what his views are on the equally shameful collusion between the Catholic hierarchy and the Nazis?

I don't hold my breath.

Johann Lamont: missing in Falkirk

 

Yes Scotland. No Gaelic. Feart horses.

It's the language that dare not speak its name. Partly because its name - Scots/ Scottish - has been hijacked by another - Inglis/ Anglo-Saxon. There are those in the movement for Scottish self-determination who regularly, and quite rightly, draw attention to how Scotland and her culture, politics and weather even is overlooked by London based navel-gazers.

One also notices that independence movements in other small nations - thinking Basque Country, Wales, Catalunya and Quebec in particular - wear their languages as badges of pride. Here though, the 'Nats' have caught the Scots cringe. Instead of educating Scots about the place of Gaelic in their history and present, they've airbrushed it from their glossy campaign.

A misty past, replete with totems...

The Gaelic Language (Scotland) Act 2005 gives Gaelic status as an 'official' language of Scotland that is entitled to 'equal respect' with the Queen's Engerlish. However, on top of Yes Scotland's stubborn refusal to countenance any Gàidhlig - or Scottish to be old-fashioned - the Scottish Government has also declined to put the language alongside English on the referendum ballot paper.

As Dr Wilson Macleod puts it in a recent paper:

 Whatever the stated rationale for the Government’s position, it seems reasonably clear that political calculation plays a role. As part of its general strategy of endeavouring not to ‘frighten the horses’ in relation to the referendum vote, the Government may well fear that a bilingual English-Gaelic referendum paper could alienate some wavering voters who might (quite unrealistically) see Gaelic as some kind of nationalist totem. A number of Gaelic-speaking independence supporters have backed this view, arguing that the symbolic value of a bilingual ballot paper is outweighed by this political risk.

from Lost in Translation.

Some say that the 'Gaels need to do it for themselves'. Aye, we should and some of us are. However, a similar argument could also be made for the Lesbian/ Gay, Asian and 'business' communities who are well catered for by YesScotland. Not only that, but as a campaign - should you target your audience or should your intended audience 'do it for themselves'? What will YesScotland do then to convince the 'don't knows' in the Gàidhlig community?

To be crude, if the London establishment and media treat us like 'Porridge Wogs' then are the Gaels amongst us even less deserving of recognition and respect? The fact that some Gaels think this way is neither here nor there - every indigenous and once-repressed people has it's own doubters. Centuries of repression and decades of having the language beat out of you in school will leave some people's self-respect at a low ebb.

But is Gaelic a 'nationalist totem'?

No for fucks sake, it's a medium. I don't know any Gaelic speakers who wear the long plaid, cover themselves in woad or Celtic tattoos and who hanker for a life amonsgt the hills acting out epic lifestyles in the vein of Cù Chulainn, Sgàthach or Fionn MacCumhail.

Will Gaelic speaking cartoon pigs threaten YesScotland's feart horses?

On the other hand we use Gaelic in everday social media, at work and at home like anyone else. And while our classical Scottish literature from the 'Fenian cycle' is an amazing part of our heritage - my kids and those at school will digest it in glossy-covered text books or from animated cartoons. Older users of the language may upload Gaelic for Punks lessons to SoundCloud or play air-guitar to Oi Polloi.

As Nancy Dorian points out in an essay on the Gaelic dialects of the east coast of Sutherland, languages enjoy the perceived status of those who speak them by those who dominate/ rule them. So, in the eyes of YesScotland, we really are Porridge Wogs?

Now the important aspect of this background is the fact that languages --  anywhere, any time --  have no independent status of their own.  Instead they have the status of the people who speak them. This explains why the prestige of languages can rise or fall so dramatically in a short time  if the fortunes of their speakers undergo an abrupt change.  If you look at Quechua, the language of the Incas, it was an imperial language, the dominant language of a large part of the Andean region before the Spanish arrived, and the Incas had in fact succeeded in imposing it on a number of the peoples whom they conquered.  Then came the Spaniards, and before very long, Quechua was an insignificant Indian language, associated with backwardness and poverty.  It wasn’t the language that changed, but the circumstances of its speakers.  The same thing happened to Irish, which was a language of great learning at a time when the Germanic peoples, including the English, were still largely illiterate and were by comparison with the Irish very little acquainted with the learning of the Classical world.  The Viking conquest, the Norman conquest, and most of all the Cromwellian conquest and the period of the Penal Laws broke the Irish, destroying the culture that had supported Irish learning.  As the Irish lost their aristocracy and became a peasantry, their language was transmuted into a peasant language, too, in spite of its past glories.                

Scottish Gaelic had claims to ancient learning and to literary respectability, too, at one point, as an offshoot of Irish with a subsequent literary tradition of its own, but the failure of the Jacobite risings in 1715 and 1746 did to Gaelic roughly what Cromwell did to Irish, and the tradition was broken and submerged, if not entirely lost.

Nancy Dorian,

Using a Private-sphere Language for a Public-sphere Purpose:  Some Hard Lessons from Making a TV Documentaryin a Dying Dialect

One worry, especially of 'radical' campaigners for self-determination, is that the SNP's vision of independence is too 'lite'. Is there any evidence of a different approach to Gaelic? We've had support from Thatcher's little puppet here, Michael Forsyth as well as from Labour's right-wing Unionist Brian Wilson. We've had a little from the 'Nats'.

In the SNP's latest dereliction of duty in relation to Gaelic, their councillors in Glasgow staged a walk-out of a meeting prior to voting through the local Gaelic Language Plan. Poor stuff.

YesScotland - get a grip. Do we want a new Scotland populated by feart horses ignorant of their own heritage and culture?

Send them a message here.

They have something whereof they are proud. What do they call it, that which maketh them proud? Culture, they call it; it distinguisheth them from the goatherds. Nietzsche

More here:
Bella Caledonia
Transceltic
Taigh na Croiche

Euskadi - colour and culture against the big nations

Having been in the Basque Country for the past few days, I've noticed much in comparison with the situation at home in Scotland from both the Spanish and French 'occupied' territories. As my visit has coincided with the final stages of Euro 2012 and the progress of Spain, the rather lacklustre support for the Spanish 'national' team has been palpable. Walking the streets of Bilbo and Donostia, you could be forgiven for forgetting that the tournament was even taking place.

In Bilbo, flags and banners celebrating the rise in fortunes of the local AC Bilbao - defacto Basque national team - are still everywhere, in shops, in cars and hanging from balconies. While there was cheering from local tabernas upon the Spanish victory, the flags and shirts of Spain have remained nowhere to be seen.

Posters on the walls remind you that 'this isn't Spain, this is Euskal Herria'. Though to be honest the indigenous culture screams at you. In Basque.

Language is and isn't a political issue. In Scotland, it just isn't. Scottish is far too often ignored by Scots and a glaring example of this is the 'Yes' campaign for independence. I'm not arguing for Scottish Gaelic to be 'promoted' by the Yes campaign. I'm arguing that it should be used. Scottish has shared a certain parity with English in as much as it's supported from different parts of the political spectrum. A language is a medium and the Yes campaign needs to harness any and every medium available particularly a language that is the anchor of the nation's culture and iconography.

The Basques on the other hand live their language across all domains within the Basque Autonomous Community - it's not just an adornment or prop for the tourists. The BAC apparently enjoys more power than any other non-nation-state on earth. It has huge industrial value and is wealthy by anyone's reckoning. It's easy to see why the monster of the Spanish state doesn't want to let it go.

In Scotland, I've noticed a new and predictable stooshie over the Scottish Government's plans to signpost all major routes in both English and Scottish. This wouldn't happen in Euskadi though it would seem as if the Basques are bold in most things they do once they are freed from the chains of Spain or France.

Even the new architecture is bold, individual and very much a statement of confidence. The Guggenheim in Bilbo is just one example. Basque nationalists in power at 'devolved' and local level pulled out all the stops to ensure that the city's revitalisation started here. Under centralist rule from Madrid, Bilbo would probably have remained a rusting industrial backwater in a 'region' of Spain. It's not only the Guggenheim though. Another example is the office of the health department in Bilbo newtown with its angular, idiosyncratic and mirrored facade. A behemoth of an old wine warehouse has been turned into a state of the art centre for culture and recreation which incorporates galleries, cinema and a glass bottomed swimming pool. Bilbo even has relatively new tram and metro systems - themselves works of art. Sure, all this costs money but what doesn't?

Which brings me back to language.

Most detractors of Scottish in Scotland are monoglots to whom bilingualism is a mystery. Occasionally though, some will embrace the benefits of bilingualism but insist that additional languages be 'useful' so that the outlay can be seen to be 'prudent'. Linguists  however declare that there is no such thing as a 'useless' language though tinpot bigots argue that only big boys of English, Spanish or Chinese - the Walmarts, IKEAs and McDonalds - of the language world are worth acquiring.

This leads me to ask, 'why Dutch?'. Almost everyone in the Netherlands speaks excellent English. Why then do the Dutch insist on speaking... Dutch?

The Basques, despite being 'fiercly nationalistic' as some might put it, also embrace multi-lingualism and multi-culturalism. I would contend that the territory under Basque control is one of most colourful, welcoming and outward looking areas in Europe. The European Union's advice on language in education is that each member state should teach 'mother tongue plus two'. The Basques insist on 'two mother tongues' plus two.

Hence some 80% of Basque primary children in the majority Basque-medium system are immersed in three languages from age zero and enter secondary school with complete or near fluency in three languages. Once in secondary, they acquire a fourth tongue which could be French, Arabic, Polish or German. Local demographics such as a significant number of immigrants often dictates the lingo learned. It's difficult to imagine white English kids in Bradford learning Urdu or Arabic or native Scottish bairns in Leith picking up Polish or Spanish.

However, the 'big nation' philosophy becomes more apparent once you cross the bridge from Irun into French Basque Hendaia. Here, some progress has been made in displaying the Basque tongue on some public roadsigns though it's obvious that the wrathful and jealous French god in Paris sees too much indulgence in languages other than French as sinful. Here, the use of Basque sadly reminds one of Scottish in Scotland - it is used sparingly but comes across as a 'prop' to paraphrase the linguist Joshua Fishman.

The shortcomings of the insular big nation with its siege mentality are also evident at the local SCNF station where the young lass on the ticket desk was unable to communicate in any other language than French. This despite the Spanish Basque country being only yards from her seat. Our pooled family tongues of Engerlish, Spanish and German fell on stony ground. Even an appeal to the auld alliance by using pigeon French-Gaelic failed.

Back in our Donostia-San Sebastian base, we watch one of the Basque language telly channels - Hamaika - which has an afternoon slot showcasing the varied Basque language music scene. It was pleasing to note many bands of the tuneful punk variety though metal, rock, pop and world music/ ska fusion was also present. Sadly, a similar program on BBC Alba which didn't feature fiddlers, songs written by dead poets, Gaelic choirs or religious music would be ten minutes long. Basque language punk is for another blog though.

The Basque Country, or most of it, is but a bawhair from complete independence. Even without the full complement of powers, it a shining example of the need to vote 'Yes' to Scottish independence in 2014. We could vote 'no' and remain a region with no voice or independent contribution of our own to the world community. We would remain tied to an inward looking and fearful big nation that remains in thrall to banks and big business, however corrupt. Or maybe we could use independence as a springboard for an open, progressive and internationalist nation that embraces our own languages as well as the cultures of others?

An elderly woman on a bus engaged us in conversation. I spoke in mistake-riddled Spanish. She replied that 'we have two idiomas'. 'So do we' said I. 'I know' she continued, 'and we're both at the same place'.

I was a bit puzzled and thought something had gone missing in translation. 'What place?'

'Independence', she replied.

Gora Euskadi. Saor Alba.

The proximity of Gaelic

Speaking to a teacher recently who had worked for a year or two in New Zealand, I found out that all primary children there learn not only some basic Maori but learn about the place of Maori in the history and culture of the country. Maori itself though is a relative newcomer to the islands - it is thought that Maori speaking people settled there around 1000 years ago. To compare to Scotland, our last indigenous people have been here for twice that or more.

Because of this, Scottish/ Gaelic is all around us in Scotland. Though if we don't speak Gaelic or learn it to some extent and aren't told about it, we don't know. The obvious step for Gaelic activists and for a Scottish government should be to make people aware of their history and environment. This should be fundamental to anyone who calls themselves an internationalist - if you don't have a nation and culture of your own, then what are you going to take to the international stage?

The Scottish Government recently announced that Scottish Studies would be mandatory at some stages of a child's education. This frightened some of the usual naysayers who see anything Scottish as being inherently inferior. To most of us, a journey into Scotland's past and present history and culture is a fascinating one. We could go back to the days when lynx and wolves were plentiful. Or examine the reasons for the building of the various monuments at Calanais or the settlement at Skara Brae. We could study the composition of Y Gododdin and the real meaning of the term 'British'. There is the Celtic knotwork and the thesis, from musicologist John Purser, that instead of being just a pretty pattern it was actually an early method of transcribing music. There are also the Picts who may have died out as a separate grouping of tribes but whose DNA lives on in many of today's Gaelic speaking population. And, of course, there's the role and place of Gaelic.

Recent evidence would suggest that the Gaels were not invaders from Ireland 1500 years ago but that they'd lived in Argyll for as long as the Picts had lived in other parts of our landmass. Sadly, Pictish is no longer with us though it is likely that some of it entered the Gaelic language.

Finally, we have a campaign to make people aware of the Gaelic that they already have on their lips in everyday Scottish language. The posters which highlight well kent words in Scotland come courtesy of Ulpan - a group that facilitates the 'ulpan' method of language teaching for the Scottish tongue. Maybe the next step is to make people aware of the Gaelic on their doorsteps? In and around Edinburgh, this could include Calton Hill as Cnoc Challtainn - Hill of the Hazel Trees or Craigentinny as Creag an t-Sionnaich or Rock of the Fox.

After all, knowledge is power and many in our society - such as racists, Unionists and religious extremists - garner their strength through ignorance and fear.

Gaelic/ Scottish then is our present and living connection to our distant past.

Further reading/ listening:
A New History of the Picts, Stuart McHardy
Scotland's Music, John Purser
Scottish Place-name Society/ Comann Ainmean-aite na h-Alba

So many devils to sup with...

So, the great horned one has spoken from his British lair in Wapping and apparently declared his support for a 'competitive Scotland'. That could of course mean independence or maybe he's just wishing Craig Levein luck in the national fitba team's encounter with Slovenia next week.

He has however been unequivocal in his praise for Alec Salmond as the best politician in these islands. The other bit-part politicians in the Parish of North Britain have not been pleased and have passed around enough sour grapes between them to make Jeremy Clarkson's haemorrhoids seem few and far between.

Willie 'warmer' Rennie of the Scottish ConDems revelled in the rancid vineyard more than most and said that Murdoch's eight words would not convince 'us' to move forward to a progressive independent Scotland that is not ruled by a minority government of ex-Eton Tories propped up by his party.

Rupert Murdoch is without doubt a grade-A cnut. But, let's face it, an independent Scotland is gonna attract the attention of saints and sinners alike. Scots or those who support our independence are not inherently 'good'. And neither are those who support a conservative and warmongering United Kingdom inherently a bunch of crackpots, Europhobes, Nazis and dinosaurs.

It's still worth casting an eye over Willie Rennie's bedfellows in the fight to 'Keep Brutain United' and to 'Keep Scotland Brutish'. Are they any better or worse than Rupert Murdoch. As ever, Tocasaid lets you - the reader - decide....

The BNP, seen here in former times

The Orange Order - no surrender to progress

Loudmouth bigot, Ian Paisley

Aye, that Ian Paisley

Er... a long-dead and 'metro-sexual' foreign monarch.

Thatcher and friends

Thatcher's apprentice

Oswald Mosely and his British Union of Fascists would approve .

The horny-handed sons of toil in UKIP.

And lastly, Jeremy Clarkson.

If Burns were here now?

Its yon nicht again and the merry ploughboy's poetry resonates as much as ever. As usual, everyone wants a piece of the cake. Even Tories. Even Lib Dems. However, even the nation's schoolkids who are taking part in school Burns' Suppers up and down the land could tell you that he... saw Scotland's rightful place in the world as her own nation, detested bigotry and the idle rich and saw no need to be bound by a 'Christian' view of monogamy.

To mark the bard's day, Tocasaid teamed up with the same crack team of graphic design whizzkids who presented us with Labour's highly sophisticated Scottish election campaign last year.

A Parcel of Rogues or Address to a Haggis?

Lib Dems? Scottish Labour? Unionists? Burns' stomach would've turned at the thought of these charlatans and liars. And the list is a long one.... Danny boy Alexander, Michael Moore, Jim Murphy, Alastair Darling, Douglas Alexander, Tom Harris, Iain Gray and Scotland's only Tory MP, David Mundane. Are they 'anti-Scottish'? Well, they're certainly doing SFA for the poorest in Scotland. As for independence - they can't make up their minds whether or not the referendum is illegal or whether Salmond should call it a.s.a.p. What a shower.

Is There For an Honest Poverty?

It could be argued that Burns had an influence on later Scottish working class champions - Hardie, Connolly, Maxton, Maclean and Jimmy Reid of late. How many of them saw the Scottish labour movement's main priority as 'saving the Union'? Morever, we hear from current Labour stooges the same old mantra of 'Tartan Tories' and of Scottish nationalists being 'insular'. Who was it though that saw the children of asylum seekers snatched from their homes in dawn raids and thrown in Dungavel Prison? Labour? How progressive.

Lay the proud usurpers low! or The Creed of Poverty

As to the English riots and the Con Dems of London? Well perhaps a verse of Scots Wha Hae?

 Lay the proud usurpers low!
    Tyrants fall in every foe!
    Liberty's in every blow! -
    Let us do or die!

Or, the Creed of Poverty?

In politics if thou would'st mix,
      And mean thy fortunes be;
    Bear this in mind--be deaf and blind;
      Let great folks hear and see.

Lastly, it would stretch things too far to claim that Burns advocated gay rights. However, as a bard with liberty and equality oozing out of his work, I don't think the bedroom habits of others would've bothered him. Especially when his own oats were well sown in many a furrow. The unholy coalition of god-botherers and bigots who are losing sleep over the proposed law to give lesbians and gays the right to marry would surely have seen a verse or two composed in ridicule.

My Luve is like...?