Homegrown Horrors for Halloween

On Oidhche Shamhna - the night before Samhain - the door between 'our' world and the world of the dead was reputed to open, allowing for all manner of supernatural beings to pass into the realm of the living. As per usual, it is an apt time to run an eye over the make-believe horrors that those in power, or those in the tabloids, deem to be a threat to our way of life.

Foreigners are usually a good bet. Especially those we see as immigrants - not 'ex-pats' like the English abroad - and asylum seekers. Last year though, saw 'the enemy within' take the limelight.

This year, its a bit of both.

Taking our jobs, having our babies, not going home.

Foreigners. There's nothing quite like a bit of bother from others to get the Great British knickers in a twist. This year, its the shocking news that 25% of all Brit babies are born to at least one foreign parent. Not mentioned is that these figures include parents from the likes of Ireland, the US, Canada - and other 'nice and white new world nations' - France, Spain and the rest of Europe. Let's face it, almost all of us must know one Scot who has a partner from one of these nations. Are we concerned?

The implication obviously is though that these foreign parents are more than likely bleck. Or maybe Asian. Or.... SLAVIC!!! And sure enough, read further into this Metro report and we see 'Eastern European' immigration getting the neep-lantern treatment. Not only that but the shadowy 'Migrationwatch' gleefully dispute the official figures and are adamant that NONE of these Slavs intend to return home after a year or two here doing the kind of work that some Bwits are too lazy or incompetent to do anymore.

On a slightly different note, one has to wonder why the English-based Migrationwatch who seem to take umbrage at the migration of Slavs, Blecks and Asians are credible sources for the media whearas the likes of Settler Watch, Scottish Watch and Sìol nan Gaidheal who highlighted mostly white and well-off English migration to Scotland were slated as 'racists'?

Lastly though, its the horrors at home that we really have to worry about. And everyone from David Cameron to Ed Miliband to Johann Lamont has been warning about them.

It's those of us who want 'something for nothing'. No, not the MPs and their expenses. No, not the bankers. No, not the Royal Family. No, not the arms dealers. No, not those in House of Lords.

There are many but old people seem to be especially scary this year. Labour have suggested that they should pay for their travel, care and prescriptions. The Tories suggest that they should work for their pensions. What the fck these old folk have been doing all their lives, I don't know. But somehow, the entire population of pensioners has reached a ripe auld age without working nor paying taxes! Incredible! Are they all Barclays or Starbucks shareholders?

Get on yer bike, coffin dodger.

Joining the elderly on the Jimmy Savile roll of dishonour are the unemployed who not only need their benefits cut but should not be allowed a chance to gain an apprenticeship according to Labour. Students too think that education should be a right and not a privilege for the likes of David Cameron, Nick Clegg, George Osborne, Tony Blair or Alastair 'Black Dwarf' Darling who were all lucky enough to go to very posh schools indeed.

There are indeed two worlds and the spectres, hobgoblins and bloodsuckers of Tory and Labour take full advantage of that open door to keep their Westminster gravy-train on the go, to stockpile their weapons of mass-destruction and to keep that gap between rich and poor from narrowing.