Jo Cox - that's where it ends

Today's murder of a pro-Euro and pro-immigration Labour MP has been brewing for years.

In the 70s, the loony National Front campaigned chiefly against black immigration. For different reasons that and a fear of general immigration subsided a bit and became the preserve of posh bigots and council-estate fuhrers. For a while.

Then it was 'illegal immigrants' though 'genuine' asylum seekers were welcomed. Now, hard-working Polish plumbers are scorned and no asylum seeker is genuine.

Now, it's mainstream and everyone from Syrian refugees to 'migrants' from other EU nations to Gaelic-speaking Australian children are objects of derision. Immigration must be 'controlled' says an England/ Britain that has long since surrendered her industries, working classes and much of her culture to multi-national big business and the banking classes.

'We want our culture back' scream toffs and neds alike as they guzzle Belgian beer, curries, nachos, pizzas, kebabs, drive German cars, use Japanese technology, watch American films, wear Bangladeshi-made clothes, write barely literate Tweets using a Roman alphabet and Arabic numerals.

For wealthy bigots like Nigel Farage and his self-appointed bodyguards in Britain First, publicity has been easy to find. Add to this the tabloid front pages - what started as a drip-fed poison has become a daily scream of fearmongering hate.

The BBC must shoulder a lot of the blame for Farage's disproportionate appearances on Question Time. The press have built him and his party up while stoking 'legitimate' fears about immigration. Britain First and other morons like the EDL - whipped up into a fury by Farage and the media - have taken their hate onto the streets in a mirror image of NF ugliness from the 70s.

Britain First and their terrorist chic.

This has culminated in the sorry spectacle that is the #Brexit referendum. Immigration has always been the main beef for most Brexit enthusiasts though unfettered access to wealth through exploitation has had its attractions too. The Leave campaign's leaflets are evidence of this - little or nothing about what Britain would do with 'complete' control - but lots on immigration. The threat of Turkey joining - and the implication that millions of their dark-skinned Muslims will come here. More insidious was the highlighting of Iraq and Syria as if they could conceivably join too at a future date.

No. The EU has its faults but fuck Brexit. We will become a fascist-lite fantasy isle as envisaged by Farage if we exit. There will be no socialist resurgence. For Scotland, we may have a second indyref  as a way-out from the madness but for England...?

Fear of foreigners shows no sign of abating.

Labour too have infamously joined in the melee with 'control immigration' mugs and even Milliband's talk of 'border guards' on the Scottish/ English border should us Scots vote for self-determination.

To their credit, some in Labour such as the late Jo Cox and leader Corbyn have stuck by their internationalist and anti-racist principles. I only wish there were more of their calibre in Labour, north or south of the border.

I'm of the view that immigration has never been an issue. People come, people go. They always have and they always will. It's nature.

Sure, some will always fear and hate the new or the unknown. There should be no excuse for that in 2016. We don't believe priests and witchdoctors anymore.

If these people, racists and fascists, cannot be educated or persuaded to keep any poisonous thoughts to themselves then they must be opposed.

The lessons of history from Spain '36 to WWII to Islamist fascists such as Daesh must be learned.

Fascism doesn't start with concentration camps - that's where it ends. No pasaran.

Seven things we have learned about #SP16

I say, jumping on the latest clickbait jargon for lazy hipster journos.

The aftermath of the 2016 Scottish elections has created a lot of froth and foam. Let's sift through the debris.

1 - The Tory revival. In footballing terms, the Tories have made the top six of the SPL after years flirting with relegation. They're still playing guff fitba but they've enjoyed some fortune against their derby rivals. They are however, a country mile behind the league leaders. Perversely, they actually polled lower than hapless Labour meaning that only one-in-five of those who voted chose Satan. Many of these were tactical votes - some from Blairite ex-Labour voters and some apparently from the farming community, angry at an SNP delay in payments.

They're still polling less than John Major did. Christ on a crutch...

SPFL league according to Ruth Davidson

2 - Labour are now entering their habitual post-election period of 'listening' to the public having acheived yet another low. It's not easy to pinpoint where exactly Labour lost the trust of its once natural constituency - Blair and Iraq? Blair himself? Abandoning nationalisation? Selling policy to billionaires like Bernie Ecclestone? The PFI disgrace? Slandering striking workers as 'fascists'? Miliband? Anti immigration mugs?

Poor Kezia Dugdale who was bewildered just a few years ago at actually being elected is even more befuddled in her current stint as human shield for the Branch Office. Maybe pics of her holding up a 'Vote Green' poster are a sign that she has sights on coming over to the good side eventually?

3- The Rev Stuart Campbell from Wings Over Scotland continues to be an objectionable wank. Tocasaid has covered his bizarre anti-Gaelic rant before but he's topped that by his stubborn and insensitive - wrong, even - comments on Hillsborough. He's also peeved that the SNP didn't get an outright majority due to us dullards not following HIS instructions though he does admit that the SNP actually increased their vote. He's now aiming his blunderbuss at anyone who questioned his #BothVotesSNP dictat, including the likes of Bella Caledonia and the Greens. Bizarrely, he's now attacking Green voters on class grounds and Bella on readership stats. I'd imagine that there's a fair bit of truth in the claim that Green voters are mostly middle-class. It's just that Stuart Campbell's adopted home of Bath, that's BATH, sticks out a bit in the roll-call of Proletarian heartlands... Toxteth, Brixton, Easterhouse, Hulme, Craigmillar, Bath...

Bye Wings, was nice while it lasted...

4 - RISE didn't rise very high at all. While I agree with the jist of them - I've voted SSP in the past - I find their existence as a political party to be pointless at this moment. Some of their stunts are bizarre and the little communication I've had with them has been off-putting.

I was amazed that while their manifesto was a nigh-comprehensive list of worthy causes that they couldn't find room for Scottish/ Gaelic culture and the more the campaign wore on, the less relevant they were to me... Driving around Glasgow in a transit blaring out Bella Ciao? A fine song, but what on earth does an Italian partisan anti-fascist anthem have to do with the Scottish elections? If RISE really need to enforce their playlist on Glaswegians, could they not find something a bit more relevant? Dick Gaughan? Hamish Henderson?

And bellowing at McDonald's customers with megaphones?

And the RISE Young Team? Who?! Presumably it was one of the Youth Team, and a candidate no less, that tweeted a death wish to the Rev Stu...Word on the street bruv is dat's a dumb ting to do...

Little wonder that despite disproportiante media coverage they finished behind Tommy Sheridan's Solidarity. Bit of a 'red neck' given their antipathy towards Tommy and his ego.

5 - The SNP did well. The SNP are patently the best vehicle on the road to independence. I'm not wedded to one party though and a plurality of parties in a future Yes campaign must be for the good. Wings Over Scotland may be right that the Greens, so far, are not 'popular' with most voters but then again neither are the SNP. Nevertheless, they do represent a significant body of opinion and that 6 to 12% depending on where you vote may deliver a crucial majority in #indyref2.

Nicola Sturgeon is a powerhouse of a politcal leader and the SNP generally a force for good. However, they do need to pay attention to who they choose to represent them in elections. Taking money from the likes of Brian Souter may not be cool but if the SNP can put his dosh to progressive use then I can live with that. On the other hand, wild horses would not drive me to vote for Christian heidbangers who openly display their prejudice to gay and women's rights. I believe there were one or two such 'guid Catholics' on the SNP list. Get rid. Personal beliefs should be kept personal. An invisible guy in the sky should have no bearing on government in a modern Scotland.

6- The Lib Dems. Meh. Can't be bothered writing about them.

7- All-in-all, with more than 50% of the vote going to pro-Indy parties and an SNP/ Green majority in Holyrood, the mandate is there to call #Indyref2 when the time is right.

Pour yourself a dram, relax and prepare for an independent Scotland sometime in the near future.

Scottish Gaelic in the #SP16 manifestos

Or not, in the case of RISE Scotland and the Lib Dems. But more about them later.

With the Scottish elections air faire - I thought I'd break my sabbatical to explore what the main parties have to say on the place of Scottish/ Gaelic in our society. Gaelic is mostly a non-partisan issue. It is a language and if it is truly of equal worth and status then a plurality of viewpoints expressed through it as a medium should not be a surprise. There are some bigots whose regular but erroneous outbursts on Gaelic issues are fodder for a new ugly breed of fringe Unionists but by and large Scottish is supported across the political spectrum.

Despite the gurning that the SNP are 'forcing' Gaelic onto an unwilling populace, they are for the most part only following legislation signed or implemented by Tories, Labour and Lib Dems in both Westminster and Hollywood.

Here we go. Let's get the worst done and over with...

The Tories - despite loose cannons like Alex Johnstone and Jackson Carlaw - the truth is that the Tories have supported Gaelic since Thatcher. Significant funding for Gaelic was first put in place by a Tory government in London. In their current manifesto, they even have a picture of Bagh a' Chaisteil and manage to state:

We continue to support Gaelic education and would welcome further dedicated Gaelic schools being set up.

Labour - the Branch Office has been generally supportive over the years. Alasdair Campbell is a piper of Gaelic-speaking Tirisdeach stock while the arch-Unionist and pro-nuke bag of bitterness that is Brian Wilson can even speak it to some degree and has been a vociferous proponent of the tongue for decades. On the other hand, one of Kezia Dugdale's first statements after expressing shock at being elected (you're not alone there a' ghràidh) was to oppose BBC Alba receiving a slot on Freeview.

Labour though is currently a chaotic mess on many fronts. As I write, a mere week before the election, their manifesto is hot of the presses. Well, kind of lukewarm. In fact, it seemed as if Scottish Labour would abstain on a manifesto this year. Sure enough given the ever decreasing standards of Labour personnel over the past few years this manifesto made even Rise Scotland's seem slick.

Two gaffes immediately caught the eye. First, the online version was published with at least one section missing - the now infamous 'hello there, hello here' gunshot to foot. Next in the language section was this...

Where on earth did they get 'Nordic' from? Norn or Norse? Or did they mean Doric? This sums up a party that has taken the electorate for granted for decades - producing shoddy campaign material with factual errors, spelling mistakes and all the finesse of a stoner staying up all night to finish a crucial essay before next day's deadline.

As to the real life language that is Gaelic, it's pretty wishy washy. Just what you'd expect from a party now famous for abstaining.

Shame, as it wasn't always like this. In their 2011 manifesto for the Highlands and Islands they stated:

Scottish Labour recognises the crucial importance of Gaelic medium education to the continued survival and flourishing of the language. We support an expansion of opportunities for learning Gaelic, including removing the obstacles to Gaelic education and growing the number of Gaelic medium teachers, especially in areas where there is strong parental demand. We will build on the achievements of the Gaelic Language Act and will enhance our support for Gaelic through encouraging Gaelic broadcasting, Gaelic arts and increased visibility for the Gaelic language in Scotland. We will also support the work of Sabhal Mòr Ostaig, the Gaelic college on Skye, and encourage new learners as well as native speakers from the traditional heartlands and beyond.

Liberal Democrats - skimming over this document after taking several wrong turns in their garish eye-stabbing website was worse than perusing the Tories' letter to Santa. Please note, multiple pics of Willie Rennie (minus mating swine) is not a positive! He either looks as if he's struggling with a bout of anal cramps or is trying very, very hard to add up the numbers of remaining Lib Dem MSPs.

This is a party that has lost any relevance it once had. With a strong representation in the Highlands, it was once very pro-Gaelic. Elected members such as John Farquhar Munro and Charlie Kennedy not only spoke Gaelic to varying degrees of fluency but were honest, likeable and even radical politicians. Now, we see the likes of the ridiculous Tavish Scott - son of the laird - playing the anti-Gaelic card in an attempt to hold onto the party's remaining 'heartland' of the Northern Isles where Gaelic does have a 'history' albeit not as a recently spoken community language by a significant percentage of the locals.

In 2011 though, they did say:

Support Gaelic medium education where there is demand and promote the language in cost effective ways.

Though funnily enough they now say that if parents in Shetland were to demand GME, they would oppose the desire of those Shetlanders to have their kids educated in Gaelic. Then again, what do you expect? They are Lib Dems after all. Would you trust a Lib Dem?

Curiously, the link to the Lib Dem manifesto I sourced included the words 'no to nuisance callers' (??!)

Answers in a Tweet please...

Scottish Greens - their online document is certainly more pleasing to the eye and does not focus on one personality (if that applies to Wille Rennie). Nothing on Gaelic education but this comes in under Arts and Cultural Diversity:

We support cultural ventures in all the languages of Scotland, including measures to encourage the use of Gaelic, the Scots tongue and the languages of those from minority ethnic backgrounds

Could do better. Support is good but any new ideas at developing the use of Gaelic?

SNP - Compared to some 'national movements' the SNP has been relatively 'language-lite' perhaps in an attempt not to 'scare the horses' as was said of the Yes campaign. Gone are the days when Gaelic slogans were part and parcel of SNP conferences. On the face of it, the SNP offer perhaps the strongest case for Gaelic though as mentioned above, until now they have mostly been building on common ground cultivated by the three main Unionist parties. That said, the present Gaelic 'heartland' of Na h-Eileanan Siar is strongly SNP at both Holyrood and Westminster levels.

Here though we have a bit more to chew on with Gaelic coming under both education and culture (A Creative Scotland) - not rocket science but something the other parties have failed to recognise. Here we go:

We will also implement new legal duties and rights to support Gaelic Medium Education as part of our ongoing commitment to stabilise and increase the number of Gaelic speakers.

 We support the central role of Gaelic arts in engaging people with the language, and enhancing the relevance of the language to Scottish society. We will also provide support for the Scots language

 We will maintain our investment in BBC Alba as a vital part of Scottish broadcasting output, and in recognition of its contribution to the development of the Gaelic language.

RISE Scotland - the new radical pro-indy alternative to the SNP 'establishment'. One could ask what is wrong with the Greens and why did the already extant SSP need to be subsumed into a new organisation but...

Nothing. They have words on many valid causes but nothing on Scotland's indigenous culture - the language, music, education, research, media, sport - not a syllable. The closest they come to Gaelic culture is promising to add yet more tax onto a bottle of whisky! Though some of their policies have a worryingly libertarian tone about them:

The primary curriculum is too cluttered, and in secondary schools the burden of assessment has become a direct barrier to better learning and teaching.

Gaelic and other languages taught as a second language would be easy pickings in attempts to 'declutter' the curriculum. Could Gaelic and other languages be taught and encouraged in other 'radical' ways? Er, we don't know. It would seem as if RISE have taken the Lord Robertson's words on 'Scotland not having a culture and languages' to heart.

Nationally, RISE will ensure that councils’ spending decisions are made using participatory budgeting techniques such as those developed in Porto Alegre, Brazil, which allow citizens to decide for themselves how their funds are spent.

'Citizens' such as Tavish Scott who could whip up a sizable minority of whingers with a grudge and decide that 'his' local area does not demand Gaelic education/ services and even if locals were to demand it, we're not going to let you have it anyway. How will these citizen panels operate? Will a simple majority vote suffice? We aren't told.

RISE should know that getting 100% agreement, or anywhere near, is nigh impossible amongst virtually any grouping of people. Otherwise, the socialists of RISE would just have joined the SSP instead of creating yet another organisation, no?

But I digress...

I expected better from RISE even though their existence at this point in Scotland's journey towards independence is a mystery to me. Their manifesto document itself is difficult to read - black text on a dark red background on some pages- gu sealladh orm!! So far, RISE seem relatively well known for certain members who gained notoriety during the indyref campaign and for others shouting at McDonalds' customers about said company's working conditions. Their highlight in the polls seems to have been a subsample of 39 voters in Glasgow, 2 of which were going to vote RISE.

In terms of a positive vote for Gaelic, the SNP promise the most. For that important list vote, you may consider the SNP again or the Greens assuming the Tories' warm words of comfort to Gaels don't wash away the knowledge of just who they are. The Lib Dems continue their downward spiral and Labour can barely get their half-baked manifesto out on time though we can assume they are still pro-Gaelic given recent voting records. RISE may as well not exist as far as we're concerned. Certainly, we don't exist in their eyes.

All in all, there's a worrying lack of action on languages of any kind from any party. Bilingualism is the norm for most people in the world. The benefits of bilingualism to children are proven. The EU is still pushing the 1+2 approach to languages and education. Bilingualism has been shown to promote positive attitudes towards diversity in children and has valuable cognitive benefits to the child.

It's been said that English is the Walmart of languages. Surely this type of myopic and imperialist attitude should be consigned to the past? If so, our politicians need to do more to equip our young people with a knowledge of their own languages, culture and history as well as insights into those of others in the world community.

Labour: missing

Murphy is in hiding. Perhaps in a designer McTernan chrysalis and about to re-emerge as yet another Jim Murphy - "At my service folks. One for me, all for me!"

Labour were horsed. Many in the party acknowledge that. Even their sole winner in Scotland - the UnionJack-clad Ian Murray seemed dumbfounded at the realisation that he, after polling well in the posh parts of south Edinburgh, was the last man standing.

It has been a slow demise though. To me, the best thing Labour in Noff Bwitan could do is to separate from the party HQ in London. If the prospect of Chukka Umunna as leader comes to pass and he does indeed take the party further to the right in order to win back the all important Middle-England, then what's left of Labour in the Scottish Parliament is sure to be further eroded.

Hearts fan Murray, or is it Rangers?

The problems are many and stretch back many years. Here's a wee saunter - in no particular order (hell - I don't enjoy Ian Murray's office expenses!) through Labour's shining path to oblivion in Scotland...

- Fascist Bastards! No, not the BNP, Ukip or even the SNP (patent pending Ian Smart) but striking firefighters. This came from the then Labour minister Dr Richard Simpson. Surely a man whose moral compass lies somewhere north of Tony Blair's broon-eye...


- Iraq. Maybe this over all others encapsulates the poverty of the modern Labour Party. Joining with a rabid neo-con US president to mercilessly bomb another nation that in no way threatened us with the loss of up 1 million lives is beyond belief.

- Immigration Mugs. This isn't the first time that Labour has tried to appear tough on immigrants but this was surely one of the most crass. I mean, what the fck! Labour, instead of taking on Ukip and the BNP and fighting for immigrants and explaining the benefits of immigration get into bed with der kleine Englander. 'We can goose-step' further than you....' Gordon 'moral compass' Brown himself lifted a National Front slogan from the 1970s - British Workers for British Jobs - to bolster his flagging campaign in 2010.

- Trident. I can mind the auld days when people like George Robertson and Murphy et al would join the CND marches. Even if you considered nuclear weapons a deterrent back in the days of the Cold War, there can surely be no justification for them now. Even army high-heid-yins and Portillo agree. It's vanity. A white fucking elephant. Even lonely Ian 'UnionJack' Murray agrees. How did he vote though...?

- Drones. No. Not the ones that Obama uses to massacre tribal children in Pakistan but the soulless careerists that took over the Labour Party... when? I don't know but probably around Kinnock's time. Just look at the likes of Murphy, Dougie Alexander, Alastair Darling as well as the 'new generation' of smooth city slickers already jostling for Weird Ed's vacated seat ... not a principled bone between them. I hope that the SNP never attracts this sort.

- Jim Murphy. There's so much been said about this guy and much in ridicule. The fact that he sits - not just as a supporter - but on the political council of the Henry Jackson Society is something that he should be confronted with. Somehow, I can't see Kaye Adams broaching the subject... Suffice to say, Murphy is toxic and only the gleeful coverage in the Unionist media of his Better Together antics has hidden this fact from some.

- PFI. It's still incredible to me that this was Labour's egg. And some wonder why many folk don't see any difference between Labour and Tory? The schools and hospitals that will be paying private-business pirates rent for the next century know this only too well.

- Better Together. And not only in the slimy campaign of scaremongering to save the bankrupt UK political system... Labour members were photographed not only with the Tories but with Ukip and National Front (!!!) activists in a desperate attempt to keep the Westminster trough open. During the #GE2015 campaign, Tories were seen at Labour Party stalls presumably to encourage a 'tactical' vote against those dangerous Nats.

What's left of a genuine left-of-centre Labour membership in Scotland needs to wake up and smell the coffee. Break from the Eton kids and banker-class of the south of England. Actually support the progressive policies of the SNP and Scottish Green Party when required to instead of blindly opposing everything they do like some buttock of an Old Firm tribalist. Lastly - when the next referendum comes - throw your weight behind the yes-campaign. A modern left-of-centre Labour Party that Keir Hardie would feel at home in, starting anew in an independent Scotland might just be the answer to SNP domination.

#GE2015: they said what?

It doesn't become Tocasaid to gloat in others misery but... seeing the queues of taxis taking away a succession of Labour and LibDem 'Portillos' is immensely satisfying. So, GIRUY. And, I really fkn hope that you do find out for real what it is like to survive on £55 a week.

Anyway, how did the high-heid-yins and talking heads in the world of politics fare - not only in the runup to #GE2015 - but in the previous years. Years that are important if we wish to examine the painful but deserved decline of the RedTories Labour Party in North Britain. Did the politicos really know any better than the footballers?

Firstly, here's the one-time socialist cum NATO chief, George Robertson AKA the Baron of Analingus Port Ellen:

"Devolution will kill Nationalism stone dead"

Now, there's the 'spider' that pulled the strings behind Jim Murphy's meltdown of a campaign - and other failures - John McTernan. The Mr Nasty of UK and Australian politics who makes Alasdair Campbell look like a life-giving ray of sunshine said,

"The No vote brings that fantasy (the SNP) to a juddering halt. The Tories will lose the 2015 general election."

oh, the Spider again,

"A no-vote will rejuvenate Scottish Labour".

Well, that one worked out well, eh?

Another nasty is George Galloway who himself is out on his arse.

"The SNP won't win a single seat from Labour."

Galloway needs to take the words 'single', 'seat' and 'Labour' and rearrange them into a new sentence.

Tha last word goes to the Dead Man Walking that is Jim Murphy,

"I'm astonished at how easy it's been to outwit the SNP"

Off to prepare the groundwork for some good drams later on. I'm sure this post will be a work in progress.

Edit: final word goes to Wings over Scotland, of course, with a pretty comprehensive account of the utter bullshit spoken by the deluded. Sure, we all make mistakes but even at the time these statments were patently ludicrous.

Revolution singalong: Murphy v. Leatherface

It's the song of the moment. Tracy Chapman's classic 'Talking 'Bout a Revolution' is the song of the morning and beyond. Jim Murphy and his election-lifebelt, Gordon Brown, were famously trolled by a young boy and his father in a pre-election school visit.

Murphy was cringeworthy in my opinion but then again, i'm no muso. Apart from the original, Sunderland's proletarian melody-makers Leatherface #fundilymundily get my vote.

Well, Jim Murphy thought he could schmooz a wee guy with a guitar at Braehead. So I played 'Talkin' About a Revolution' - I think the irony might have been lost!!` Lol
Posted by Matthew Gibb on Saturday, 2 May 2015

Football celebs vote in #GE2015!

We all know that Alex Ferguson is a Labour man, whatever their policies are. Also that ex-Hearts and Hibs red-card junkie Michael Stewart is an intelligent advocate of independence and is backing the SNP. Terry Butcher is, or at least used to be, a Tory. But, let's face it, fitba celebs rarely put their heads above the parapet on the political front.

Tocasaid will hazard a few guesses though.

So, with the election upon us and episodes of mindless sickening violence (see above) now in the past, let's enjoy some 90-minute nuggets...

First up is house-favourite Leigh Griffiths. Hibs fan and righteous Celtic FC forward has been banging in the hat-tricks lately. His ongoing hat-trick seems to be the triple-grudge of racism, homophobia and Islamophobia. That's surely makes him a Ukip man.

Moving slightly to the left, we have Ally McCoist. He's a well known Unionist and with Oldco Rangers having corned the right-wing conservative market for fans in recent decades, he's sure to be a Tory. In fact, I reckon he's so taken with Scottish Conservatism that he's morphing into Ruth Davidson.

Anne Budge of Hearts and Leanne Dempster of Hibs are two independently-minded women with clear visions of what their respective clubs should look like. They also thrive in an otherwise backward-male environment. That makes them SNP fans of oor Nicola.

Robbie Neilson. Young manager who's quiet demeanour has nevertheless yielded spectacular results for Hearts this season, albeit in the second tier. They won the league by a country mile as the SNP are predicted to do on May 7th. SNP again for this winner.

 

Lee 'Elbows' McCulloch. Past the sell-by date footballer and vicious hardman of The Rangers FC. Even his own fans don't like him. Other fans detest him. Referees don't know he exists. He's not very popular. He must be a Lib Dem.

Alan Stubbs. Used to be a likeable guy but has grown into one hell of a bitter man this season as Hibs yo-yo all over the place - one minute they're horsing Sevco and the next allowing Christian Nade of all people to dance around their defence and score. Given his bitterness towards other teams and fans coupled with the fact that his team finished a very distant second to winners Hearts, he has to be a Labour man. No Jim Murphy though as Stubbs is just bitter, not evil.

Inverness Caledonian Thistle. Hell, we may not all support them but most of us have a soft-spot for them. There's Yogi for a start who's gone from buffoon to manager of the year. And, there's the excellent Twitter account. The Frankie Boyle of the football Twitter world though not as foul-mouthed. They also love beating the corporate-corpse of Scottish fitba - Celtic FC. I'm sure they're partial to a few jars and a 'wee smoke'. Defo a Green Party team and what's wrong with that?

Angry denials or accusations of hate-speech here? Contact the Daily Mail. Corrections or suggestions? Post below.

Vote early, vote often, vote SNP.

Play Murphistory bingo now!

As we go to the polls with North Britain expecting a Labour meltdown, can you really get to the bottom of the enigma that is Jim Murphy? Is he a nice guy? Is he a nasty guy? Did he sniff glue? And, can he remember?

Now we, the once Labour-voting plebes, can join in the fun. What is true? What is fiction?

For added mystery, you can spin our Murphistory Quadruple Chance spin wheel!

So, get the family. Get their bahookies on those IrnBru crates (only provided with MPs' expenses) and play all night long! UHU too can be a Murphy!

For further research:

• http://www.counterfire.org/articles/opinion/17573-five-reasons-why-jim-murphy-s-election-is-bad-for-the-labour-movement
• http://wingsoverscotland.com/the-sure-thing/
• http://www.heraldscotland.com/news/home-news/jim-murphy-named-among-27-mps-in-new-expenses-row.1350640850
• http://autonomyscotland.org/jim-murphy-gift-snp/
• http://bellacaledonia.org.uk/2014/11/05/jim-murphys-selfless-devotion-to-scotland/
• http://caltonjock.com/2014/08/29/man-of-a-1000-faces-jim-my-way-or-the-highway-murphy-the-ups-and-downs-of-a-con-man/

Labour/ Ukip coalition on the cards?

Many have looked on with a morbid fascination as Labour in recent years has moved further and further to the right. It's been truly horrible though the reality of what's happened has been evident enough. It's as if Jackie Baillie rolled up to your house just to squat on your lawn and lay a huge steaming log. You'd look on, intoxicated by the novelty of the scene but horrified by the spectacle and consequences.

And, what are the consequences of Labour's latest attack on Johnny Foreigner? I hate to think.

Or to put it another way, Labour are unashamedly going for the racist/ Ukip/ Bnp/ EDL/ Britain First vote at a time when the Daily Mail's bogeyman du jour, Alex Salmond, is talking up the benefits of immigration.

For the Middle-England audience, Labour have been falling over themselves to distance the party from the SNP. Yet up here, Murphy is trying to airbrush his many past misdemeanours by embracing any 'Clause 4' ideology from free tuition to free prescriptions.

Labour too should be confronting the Little Englanders head-on instead of stoking their fears. Whether they come from Germany or Nigeria, whether to pick our veg or perform brain surgery - immigration is good. Culturally too, the benefits are evident all around us. The fact there are some dinosaurs in every group of people - be they immigrants or 'natives' - who are scared of 'the other' makes it all the more important to stand up to the bullshit of the anti-immigration rhetoric. Labour have form on this though. From local-campaign leaflets to Gordon Brown lifting NF slogans from the 1970s - British Jobs for British Workers.

Why does this need to spelled out in the year 2015?

And the consequences? The political spectrum of the 'paedo-parliament' in Westminster is pulled further to the right. Roll on the next indy-ref.

Happy Winterval from Scottish Labour

If the real life Tony Blair Xmas card wasn't bad enough - they seem to be impersonating some of the cast of Hellraiser - Scottish (or was it London?) Labour have decided the way to tackle the SNP in Scotland and to win back the working class pro-independence vote is to move to the right. Labour's answer to Johann Lamont's leadership-suicide note accusing the London Labour machine of dictating to Scotland is to... parachute in a right-wing Blairite who doesn't yet have a seat in Holyrood.

The fact that he was the only candidate for the job who form cohesive sentences doesn't say much for the wealth of talent in Scottish Labour. The 'left wing' choice Neil Findlay is relatively more traditional Labour but in a shambling interview on BBC Scotland radio, he didn't seem to know his arse from his elbow.

Murphy though has had his fingers in many dirty pies over the years and more than likely has a cupboard full of skeletons waiting to appear. He's rumoured to be a millionaire which leads one to ask, how can someone spend nine years at university - at our expense - before leaving without graduating to 'forge' a career in the Labour Party machine and come out 20 years later as a millionaire? I wonder if his expenses claims have helped a little?

Did Murphy know?

More importantly though, as a Blair loyalist and supporter of the illegal Iraq war, just what did holy-willie Jim Murphy know about the CIA torture of prisoners? Where did he stand on the rendition flights that used Prestwick as a stepping stone?

We look forward to those bones being revealed.

These are interesting though...

Jim Murphy, Torture Apologist

Jim Murphy – the wrong answer to the wrong question

Scotsman censors itself...

 

Was alerted to an amusing story of Johann Lamont's woes today in Govan. However, the link to the negative 'off the no-message' story in the Scotsman was... not there. Instead, would be voyeurs got this:

So, the Scotsman is now censoring its own stories?! Fortunately, some evil hackers swiftly organised by Alex Salmond himself on behalf of Yes Scotland's IT squadron were able to access an archived copy. Archived after 3 hours? Wonder why....? After all, it was billed as a 'top story'.

Whose ass is on the line for this one then - the author or the sub-editor? Even worse, they let slip that working-class Govan, home of The Rangers no less, is now an 'SNP heartland'. Expect a call from Darling sometime soon.

SCOTTISH Labour leader Johann Lamont got the wrong No vote today when she took to the SNP heartland -- and was met with closed doors.

The MSP for Glasgow Pollok made a ‘behind enemy lines’ visit to Govan, in deputy leader Nicola Sturgeon’s Govan constituency, to argue the pro-Union case with voters.

But despite an army of Labour supporters knocking doors, only three residents engaged in conversation with her - while several even came outside to return the leaflets pushed through their letter boxes.

The weak response from SNP voters got worse when a pensioner refused to even discuss with Lamont how she would be voting on the 18th.

But Lamont later insisted it had been a successful exercise and not a waste of her time.

She said: “I’m very positive about the response that we got. It’s reflected the response that we’ve got across the country in Labour areas.

“Labour people are committing to vote No whilst the SNP’s supporters are committing to vote No as well, because they recognise they can get the benefits of devolution.”

But she claimed she did not see the local residents only come outside to give back the Labour leaflets.

She said: “Well I didn’t see that.

“Everywhere you go you’re going to have some people who are not going to be happy to see you, but right across the country I’m getting a very warm response on the doors because people know that for us this is not about what our party is saying, it’s what’s in the best interest of the people of Scotland.”

The Scottish Labour leader also said she was not concerned about an increasing number of women Labour voters apparently moving towards independence.

She said: “It’s not what I’m finding on the doors. I think particularly women are recognising that actually you wouldn’t put your family’s future at risk.

“They’d be expected to deal with a £6 billion black hole from day one and we know that’s a real problem and women recognise that.”

Source here.
Headline image from this excellent blog.

Jim Murphy over eggs his pudding

Tocasaid is only too pleased to join the chorus of disapproval at the disgusting and mindless violence that befell Jim Murphy yesterday in a Fife town. We trust that Police Scotland are throwing all resources behind identifying the man that catapulted Murphy's sorry tour into the headlines.

It is indeed shocking that Murphy used a microphone to bellow over an old-age pensioner who challenged him on Gordon Brown's lies on the NHS.

It is indeed shocking that one of his Labour colleagues told a woman recovering from cancer to 'get a job'.

It is indeed shocking that in places, Labour councillors wearing their council name tags were wheeled out to provide an audience.

It is shocking that many think Murphy has engineered this stunt to take people's attention away from the paucity of his arguments and that after supporting the Iraq War and the Tories' Welfare Cap that people now think of him as a 'Red Tory'.

Delivery for Mr Murphy.

Jim Murphy's ordinary followers hit the capital

 

Jim Murphy is a thoroughly unpleasant individual.

I'm convinced that he is the thin, more conservative version of George Galloway. Neither like being challenged and will blow and bellow any naysayers aside. Bullies.

Galloway-Wilson roadshow

On the other hand, whereas Galloway rarely has anyone accompanying him to hog the limelight - other than maybe Brian 'poison dwarf' Wilson making a cameo appearance - Murphy has a small cadre of weird looking drones in suits to beef up the numbers. These followers seem to have a dual purpose - they can act as 'grassroots' listeners in the PR photos but also Jim can rope them in to laugh at anyone who questions him.

Myself and a friend got wind that he was gonna do his 'soapbox' thing 'opposite' a certain pub on the seafront in Edinburgh West. We're both left of centre and can both remember meeting Mr Murphy on anti-racist marches in Glasgow some time ago - back when Murphy was an NUS high-heid-yin hoping for a cushy career in the Labour Party.

My friend is a member of UNISON and hails from a Glasgow scheme. Indeed, he admitted to having been a member of the Labour Party Young Socialists some 30 years ago. Both of us are public servants and are seeing our pensions eroded and pay frozen. We also don't like it that Better Together see fit to use sectarian BNP supporters who one day tweet that 'Catholics should hang from lamposts' while the next appearing on televised Better Together propaganda posing as 'ordinary voters'.

Things are slow to get going but at half an hour later than the scheduled time there are around ten BT automatons gathered. There is no 'juice crate' or megaphone. Instead, Jim and his weird looking band set up camp in a local beer garden. Two shiny drones in BT jackets take to the esplanade for all of 3 minutes to hand out leaflets. No-one seems interested so we engage the drones in conversation and are invited across 'for a chat' in the beer garden where Jim is holding court with a pint in hand. Farage?

Where is William Hague Jim Murphy?

One lady is stating that the NHS is "100% devolved". I add that maybe the running of it is up to us but the financing certainly isn't. Something that Labour-affiliated UNISON seem to agree with.

I raise the Yvonne Hama issue. Murphy asks 'Did that sway you into voting Yes or were you Yes beforehand?' I say it doesn't matter - you shouldn't use racist sectarian nutters in your publicity. 'If you were Yes beforehand then it isn't an issue' he retorts.

Better Together's grassroots - kept hidden today

During the conversation, another friend who's working on a documentary about the referendum texts to ask where Murphy is going next. Reasonable request, no? However, this is where things get really weird.

"It's all online" says one of the drones. 'No it isn't, my friend has tried. Can you tell me just now though?'

"Stick to the issues" says a posh professional PR guy in a suit who wears a 'No Thanks' badge.

Eh? We're confused. 'We aren't arguing, only saying that a friend would like to interview Mr Murphy for his documentary. He's a Swedish film-maker...'

"Shut up and listen!" says the posh suit.

'Er... where will you be next...?"

Murphy steps in, guffawing and egging on his Mormon-esque mates to shout us down. An elderly posh couple - they look like something from Condé Nast Boat Owner mag - step forward. They old guy approaches me in an aggressive manner, finger wagging, "Why don't you just shut up and stop shouting over Jim" he says like an angry father.

I persist. 'Listen. There's a chance for you air your views in a documentary...'

Jim and Posh Suit raise their voices. 'OK these guys obviously aren't interested in the real issues. let's all move over to another table'.

At this point, we open our jackets to show off our bulging belts of explosives as Murphy seems to expect. "Saor Alba!" we cry as we detonate ourselves sending Yessers and BT loons alike into space...

No. You can't join the club.

Actually, we just left.

It's sad when a discussion with an MP leads to said MP and entourage putting their fingers in their ears and yelling 'nah nah nah....!'

We were struck by a number of things...

• my friend said that they were the poshest Labour guys he'd ever met
• none of them looked 'ordinary' - they were like pseudo-religious politico hobbyists
• Jim Murphy doesn't like being challenged as has been evidenced in his '100 Days of Sodom' tour
• Murphy has the desperate air of a man who sees his seat on the gravy train evaporating
• they made no attempt to persuade us to vote 'no'

The future must be ours.

Jim Murphy 0 - Auld Lady 1

Or in other words, Jim Murphy's Chernobyl. Or Jim Murphy becomes a bellowing bullying blawhard against a wee pensioner. Or Skeletor's demise...

Who was the last desperate politico to attempt a 'soapbox' stunt in public? Was it William 'Happy' Hague on his 'Save the Pound' tour? Anyway, Murphy reminds me of George Galloway who also resorts to shouting others down when faced with difficult questions.

Whatever, some points to consider from Murphy's very public anal hemorrhage are:

• the pensioner offers a seasoned politician a fair question
• Murphy can't even look her in the eye
• despite the sparse attendence, he feels the need not only for a megaphone but has to yell constantly as if to deafen his naysayers into submission
• he lies again - the NHS in England is being privatised bit by bit and his Labour colleagues in England have confirmed this though not opposed it
• all he has to fall back on is.... Braveheart! 

Where's the auld wumman?